If you want to work a solid program through a 12 step fellowship your first goal should be to find a sponsor. If you are thinking about doing this you are probably wondering how to find a sponsor. Well, the good news is that it is easier than you think and once you do it you are well on your way to finding recovery.
If you want to find a sponsor than you must know that choosing a sponsor is like choosing your best friend. Sometimes it just happens and sometimes you plan it. Finding a sponsor can be scary and intimidating at first but it is simple.
What is a sponsor?
A sponsor is the person who will take you through the 12 steps of any 12 step programs. Different 12 step programs do the 12 step differently so make sure you choose someone from the fellowship you desire. When going through the steps it’s important to note that it’s not about how long it will take or what is in the steps but that a relationship with a higher power is emphasized. Any good sponsor knows that the 12 steps are there to help you help other people not to just make you feel better. Sponsors are the people who lead by example who can help you through their experience and who have gotten sober and found recovery and can now help you find that too.
First rule of thumb in how to find a sponsor; is if you are woman choose a woman to sponsor you and if you are a man choose a man to sponsor you.
Continue going to the same meetings every week and pay attention to the people who are also there consistently. Usually at the end of 12 step meetings they have those people who are willing to sponsor raise their hand. Pay attention and look for someone you may have seen before or who you think might be a good fit for you.
If you know someone with a little bit more time than you might want to ask them if they have any numbers or have any good suggestions of a sponsor for you. Anyone you know who has been around for a while can probably help you to find a sponsor.
There are some factors in how to find a sponsor that is a good fit or can really help you. If you are looking for good quality recovery you want to have a sponsor who also has good quality recovery.
Here are some qualities to look for in order to find a sponsor:
- They have what you want
- They live in the solution and not the problem. This means that they talk about how they have solved their drinking and drugging problem not how bad it was etc.
- Takes action in their recovery doesn’t just talk about it
- Has a sponsor themselves
- Emphasizes steps, traditions and relationship with a higher power
- Has more time in recovery than you do
- Has worked more steps than you have
- Is available for phone calls and personal meetings
- Emphasizes the spiritual aspects of the 12 step fellowship
- And last but definitely not least is the same gender as you
If you or someone you know needs drug or alcohol treatment, call us at 800-951-6135 or visit us online at www.palmpartners.com.