A lie is something that you make yourself believe in order to make life a little easier and to avoid some level of pain. Lying to ourselves is something we do in order to protect our fragile egos. But, lying to yourself will destroy you, inside and out.
The difference between a lie and the truth can be very subtle and, a lot of the time, your brain will try to “logically” trick you into believing the lie. You are lying to yourself because you want to be comfortable. Everyone has that fear of the unknown that can keep us in our comfort zone. But, when you realize the price you pay for selling yourself out to comfort, you’ll probably want to change.
Here are 13 signs you’re lying to yourself:
#1. You try really hard to fit in but it feels awkward/wrong
That’s because you’re not being true to yourself. Plain and simple.
#2. You rely too much on your logic and not enough on your gut
There’s such a thing as the mind-body-spirit connection, even western doctors agree. When you rely too much on your head and don’t listen to your heart, you’re lying to yourself and could be headed for trouble.
#3. You consider yourself to be an anxious person
You’re only anxious all the time because you’re not living your truth. You’re trying to be something/someone you’re not and in doing so, are denying your true self. Of course you’re going to feel awkward and anxious.
#4. You stay in your comfort zone
They say our world gets smaller in active addiction. So, if you find that your world is just as small in sobriety that means you’re unwilling to go outside of your comfort zone. The problem with that is you can’t grow when you’re confined to such a small box. This is a sign that you’re lying to yourself in that you’re telling yourself it’s unsafe to go “out there” and that “no one will like me if I let people in.” These are complete lies.
#5. You don’t explore your passions
There’s so much more to life now that you’re clean and sober. If you’re not discovering or re-discovering what you love, your passions, then you’re not living. You’re simply surviving. Sobriety is all about thriving.
#6. You tell yourself you’re in this alone
We’re all in this together. A lot of people make the mistake of believing they are terminally unique and that no one will understand them. Open your mouth and share, you’ll see just how many people can identify with you.
#7. You put others’ needs way before your own
You are lying to yourself when you neglect to take care of yourself because you are basically telling yourself that everyone else is more important, more worthy of love and care, than you are. Bullsh*t.
#8. You allow yourself to get distracted
Sometimes called “acting out” or even “cross addiction,” you allow other things to take place of your drug of choice. Maybe it’s relationships, or sex, or work, or working out, or online gaming. You do this to get away from the real stuff — the hard problems, such as working on character defects. You look for ways of distracting yourself so that you don’t have to actually work on a solution (i.e. your program).
#9. You settle All. The. Time
You tell yourself all those self-limiting beliefs like, “I don’t deserve this,” “I’m not worthy,” “I’m not good enough.” You know, all those nasty things that you probably wouldn’t even say to someone you don’t like. We all have them. And they are all LIES!
#10. You worry about what others think
And you let their opinions define you: the way you view yourself and your actions.
#11. You seek popularity and what’s going to benefit you in some way
Instead of seeking authenticity – you know, people and pursuits that you truly enjoy, you follow the in-crowd and the almighty dollar.
#12. You make rash decisions
You call the shots from a stressed out state of mind and have knee-jerk reactions instead of giving yourself a moment to compose your thoughts and check in with your gut. You tell yourself that this is the best way to make decisions.
#13. You believe that you’re a procrastinator and that’ll never change
You think your best work is done when it comes down to the wire. Really what’s happening is you’re selling out to comfort and lazy. You’re complacent; resting on your laurels. Procrastination leaves little time except for the bare minimum.
If you or someone you love is struggling with substance abuse or addiction, please call toll-free 1-800-951-6135.