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The Martyr Complex and How to Overcome It That pink cloud dissipated some time ago and you’re left feeling not-so-spiritual. Most likely, it’s time for an attitude adjustment. Here are 5 signs your attitude needs some adjustment as well as ways in which you can fine-tune your outlook on life.

1: People often ask you why you always look so mad (also known as “b*tch resting face”) You frown a lot even if you don’t realize it. Now, some people might argue that that’s just how they naturally look but, honestly, our bodies (and therefore our faces) have this knack of reflecting how we feel on the inside. That said, if you seem to feel achy and sore a lot (and not because you’re exercising) and you have a tendency to scowl, it’s likely a sign that your attitude needs some adjustment.

Attitude Adjustment: Instead, try making a conscious effort to smile, even if you don’t feel like it. There’s actual scientific evidence that smiling can relieve some of that stress and irritability and, eventually, you’ll smile because you’re, well, happy.

2: You’re always complaining about something I’m sorry but, these people are the worstttt. It’s times spent with negative people that are my biggest challenge at practicing compassion. If you’re always thinking negatively then, you’re always constantly saying negative things and putting out negative energy (whether you realize it or not) and this is the quickest, most effective method to drive people away.

Attitude Adjustment: Instead, try change the language you use. Get rid of negative, critical and self-defeating language. Use statements like, “I can” and “I will.” Another good one is to say “I get to” instead of “I have to.” Even when it comes to going to work or the dentist. Because, when you really think about it, it’s a privilege that you get to work and have good health and hygiene. Words have power, so choose the positive option and watch how it changes your attitude. Also, ditch the negative people in your life.

3: You never feel satisfied You’re constantly thinking that the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence when it comes to your job, your relationship, your body, everything.

Attitude Adjustment: Get in the practice of writing gratitude lists because this is a great way to adjust this ‘not enough’ attitude. You’ll have it right there, in black and white – evidence of all the great things you have going for you.

4: You’re irritable and quick to anger If you feel ‘on edge’ a lot, that is, easily annoyed or even angered, then this is one of the more telling signs your attitude needs some adjustment. Of course we all have our “off-days” when we’re just not feeling our 100% but, if you’re having more off days than on days, you’ve gotta do something about that attitude. It only serves you to shift your perspective. I mean, who would want to walk around all angry all the time? It sucks.

Attitude Adjustment: Meditate. Talk about it. Breathe. Eat right. Exercise. Pray. And then, choose to get off it.

5: Your sponsor has to remind you not to take other people’s inventory You’re constantly finding fault with others and you blame others for everything, even when you make a mistake. If you knock a drink over, it’s because the waiter put it too close to your elbow. You can’t (read: won’t) take any responsibility for yourself. Having a crappy attitude is to blame.

Attitude Adjustment: Focus on yourself and the ways in which you can improve. You can’t make other people do, say, or think what you want them to. And going around like that will only be an exercise in futility that will surely only fan the flames of your ire towards others for well, not being like you. Practice compassion and remind yourself that we all have our battles and crosses to bear and that we’re all in this thing called ‘life’ together. If you or someone you love is struggling with substance abuse or addiction, please call toll-free 1-800-951-6135.

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